With oneself… with the partner… with life! Love Yourself to Succeed in Life
There is no doubt that every one of us is looking for a happy life, whether a private life or a married one, and despite the many ways we adopt to reach it, it remains incomplete and needs a deeper understanding of things.
Today, with the development of knowledge, there is no longer a problem in our lives that cannot be solved with the help of specialists we meet in many fields. Among those is the coach Dalal Al Janaie, representative of the international company Mars Venus for coaching and consultations, holder of an accredited certificate from Dr. John Grey for life and business coaching, and host of Insijam Podcast, a youtube program that treats in each of its episodes a specific topic while offering the best solution for every problem we face in life.
How can we change our lives for the better? How can we arrange our life so it becomes better and more beautiful?
Change is good, beautiful and important. All people need it. It is the magic word they all want. Many of my female followers ask me about change that in my point of view comes from the inside of the human being, and it is a choice “that needs serious attempts and not to think about failure”. I remember during my studies that one of my professors of Canadian origin once told me that when he wanted to establish his own project, he got rid of thinking about the obstacles that could stand in his face because he wanted to succeed and this is what happened.
You should know that a large part of changing your life begins with the courage to face the change.
Now at the beginning of this New Year, how can we set new targets and what are they limited to?
At the beginning of each year, every one of us sets goals and plans but by the end of the first month of the year these plans begin to disappear and thus our energy and resolution decrease and we start asking ourselves: Why? What happened? It is important to be aware that the plan is not as important as the reason behind it. In fact girls who attend my lectures put plans that are not based on foundations coming from the heart, they are often linked to staying away from fears, concerns, failures in their lives. That means that we run away from fear and not after something we want, for example the saying I do not want to be sad is completely different from the one saying I want to be happy. The goal is always linked to plans and dreams. But the dream is different from the plan and will not lead you to the goal, but the plans will do so.
Quote: “The main idea behind each plan and each goal is the word “why “, what do you want from every goal you want & why are you listing it as a goal?
How can we get happiness in life, what steps should we follow?
Happiness is something we hear about permanently and each one of us wants to reach it but doesn’t know how? Today in our society, there is a tendency towards positivity and this may serve us or vice versa. Personally, I do not support positivity without foundations, but I believe that women and men must first clean their inside to reach happiness because over the years a lot of things accumulate in our inner, whether attitudes, shocks, sorrows or false beliefs that destroy happiness and harmony in our lives and thus hurt us. A great part of happiness is to start searching for happiness in our lives by cleaning our inner from past accumulations with the assistance of specialized trainers. Second, happiness may be linked to staying away from some people or getting rid of feelings of injustice. This can be done through special sessions and consultations. Happiness is not only related to your saying I will be happy, but to the fact of accepting and loving yourself and accepting the reality even if the world is not beautiful, one should try to beautify and change it.
Every relationship in this life requires sacrifices from both partners, what is the meaning of sacrifice and its types?
When we talk about relationships, especially marital relationships, it is said that marriage is a sacrifice and whenever a woman sacrifices she becomes happier, but I am not one of those who believe in sacrifices. For example, if a woman comes to me and says that she made lots of sacrifices, once we ask her husband, his answer will be that he didn’t ask her to do so, and that is the truth since we as women think about unnecessary or incorrect or unreal things, we interact and give in a way that does not serve us. I believe in something called “choice” and not sacrifice. I always tell my trainees that the relationship is about two people supporting each other, and if one gives more or less, the relation will fall apart. The woman’s role is to be conscious that sacrifice is her own choice and the one who wants to sacrifice will be the “victim” at the mercy of the other, and will have to give up all his rights without the other partner being guilty. Nobody will sympathize with the one who sacrifices more than himself.
Quote: “I support women expressing themselves and their emotions through writing, as a self-reflection method, in addition to meditation and conscious breathing which are two ways that I use with my trainees”.
You mentioned in one of your lectures that there is a detox plan for relationships, can you explain more?
Many people do not know what is happening in their relationships and when there is an imbalance in consciousness or lack of awareness in what is happening between them and the person in front of them, that means that they have entered the circle of blame, doubt and grief because they are lost and not because they are bad. The relationships detox is a podcast that talks about relationships that do not serve us and therefore many relationships need detox. That means cleaning up the relationships around us since there are people who make us feel inferior, show jealousy towards us or use hurtful words with us. This year I want you to ask yourself: Who from the people around you should come out of your life?
We always face life-long emotional wounds, how can we recover from them and follow our lives?
People believe that time cures all wounds and I am not a proponent of this belief but I believe that time strengthens wounds caused by relationships that ended in grief or caused shock, pain and regrets. Every person has passed through situations that caused him grief and trauma and this is normal, but what is not normal is not dealing with these situations. There is a very beautiful book entitled “Letting go” that talks about dealing with emotions in many ways, such as facing them and then allow them to leave and this is the best way. Other ways are represented by hiding feelings in the subconscious. As for how to deal with the emotions interred in our lives, it is the competence of the skilled coach or psychiatrist who deals with the wounds of the past, because the past affects the present and the future together.
Quote: “There’s nothing called “I will try”, instead there must be seriousness in your tone and your willingness to achieve whatever it is you’re trying to do.”
What are your tips for a successful married life?
One of the most important things that I learned over the years is that women should love and know themselves well because we did not learn at a young age how to love and appreciate ourselves and how to deal with them. If I don’t know myself, I will look for it in someone else and this will have a very negative impact. How do you know and love yourself? This needs time, effort, focus and seriousness and I always advise girls to invest in themselves. I advise them as well to read, because marriage needs awareness, focus and cleverness; not every married person is successful in his marriage and I advise them to never listen to their friends and family members, but to talk to specialist and never wait to face a problem to ask for advice.
Quote: “Ask for advice early, and let your future perspective dictate your actions. Constantly ask yourself whether you are doing something to benefit your future or the current moment only.” The main goal is not in marriage itself, but instead in its longevity “.